This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
