You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
she smelled like a LAN party
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
