I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
