Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Randomize
