I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize