So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
only you would photoshop your dick
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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