I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
