Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
This is classic penis vs brain.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
