you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
