I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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