WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize