You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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