It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Just puked most of my soul out..
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
