Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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