are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
