white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
