My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
