She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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