ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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