Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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