Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
