Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
