What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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