she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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