If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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