THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
