Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Your shirt... Was in my pants
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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