My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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