I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize