I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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