shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
