New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
