There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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