i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize