Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
