Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize
