You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
