How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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