Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize