Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
