I'm really into asian looking animals
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Randomize
