There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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