walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
There's always time for handjobs
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
