I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
