NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
