im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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