Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
