Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
