Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
