we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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