I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
