her vagine was all disorganized.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
